BEING DIFFERENT AND BELONGING - Alejandra Bernal

“Everybody says it is going to be so difficult! Will I be able to keep up with homework? What if I don’t make any friends? It is a big place; I am worried that I will get lost….”.

“It will be fine, pequeña mía, it is normal to be anxious before starting middle school. I am also feeling a little nervous.” As I tried to reassure my daughter, I wondered how I would fit in as a new genetic counseling student at Pitt. Would I be able to achieve schoolwork- family balance? What challenges would I face as a non-traditional applicant and the only parent in my cohort? How many candles should I offer to all holy saints, so nobody gets sick for 2 years?

Starting the summer before classes, I began to know and connect with my new tribe. Some are simultaneously enrolled in Genetic Counseling and Public Health programs, a few live with their partners, and many hold part time jobs. We all seem to have different priorities and backgrounds: but I can relate to each one at some level. Our values and aspirations bridge our differences. Whether juggling multiple responsibilities or facing the anticipation of clinical rotations, we have found solidarity in our shared journey. Anyone can ask for help, and one of us will take the time to explain a concept or post that hard-to-find article. We don’t always agree or hang out together, but we celebrate birthdays, enjoy some activities outside campus (like apple picking, playing Secret Santa or getting boba tea), work hard, and try to keep a positive attitude. My assigned “buddy” and the other second years have provided invaluable guidance, while virtual peer groups for minority students offer insights and motivation.

The faculty has been very welcoming from the beginning. When I mentioned I had a disability, the program director encouraged me to apply to the Disability Resources and Services office (DRS). I followed her advice, the university quickly processed the application, and the requested accommodations have been fulfilled. All professors have been very understanding, providing support and confidentiality. I chose to write about my experiences, hoping to remind prospective and current GC students with disabilities to seek the services they need. Just a recommendation: start collecting the necessary documentation to apply as soon as you can. Getting an official diagnosis can take time.

Grad school is difficult, as was predicted. There are never enough hours to do everything that you would like to do. It requires a lot of planning and flexibility, and often, things don’t go as you expected (we all got COVID in January, where were those saints?). Having less time to spend with my family has been hard, but they help as much as they can. For example, explaining genetic concepts at a 6th grade level is easier when you can practice with an actual middle schooler. My teenage son is now my personal IT helpline, and my husband has discovered the fun of cooking for picky eaters. When I need to stay home, because the kids are sick or their schools are closed, I am able to attend most classes virtually. It is also helpful that the majority of lectures at Pitt are recorded, classmates share notes (they are the best!), and professors are always willing to answer questions. Studying while being a parent is not easy, I am lucky to have the support of the program, family and friends.

I did get lost during the first weeks of the semester, even more times than my child did at her new school (parking in Oakland is an adventure). However, the warmth and help I receive from my classmates and the faculty has eased my initial worries. Yes, I am not your average GC student, but I am not defined by a single aspect of my identity. Every facet and intersection shapes who I am, gives me grit, creativity, keeps me grounded when things get hectic and adds to the professional I want to be. I can connect and belong to this cohort of unique individuals with their own experiences, strengths, and perspectives. I also feel that I belong to this program, that is trying to promote equal access and opportunities.
To all students, regardless of where you match, I hope you also find a sense of belonging.